The Power of the Black Voice: If We Speak, They Will Listen

By H. Lewis Smith

Hip-Hop music is an art form all unto itself.  Its unique rhythmic beat and craftily-packaged rhymes can be very catchy, entertaining and stimulating. Because listeners are often caught up by the beat and impressed with the artist’s literary creativity, and, perhaps are just happy to see one of their own finally make it, they tend to overlook and/or downplay the real message(s) being conveyed; this may help to explain why some rap records with self-destructive, violent, demeaning and insensitive lyrics in nature can be so popular. Rappers feel that they are just entertaining, storytellers, saying what “sounds good”, but the truth of the matter is that their messages do carry clout, are influential, and can evoke action; as such, they must be mindful of what they say, and the artists and their sponsors must be held accountable for the artists’ actions and words.

Self-respecting people are tired of being sold out by heartless, money-hungry rappers. They are becoming less passive and apathetic about the images and messages being conveyed, and are now gaining the gumption to speak up and out against the undignified portrayals rappers promote. Rap artist Lil Wayne came under fire in February for lyrics comparing the 1955 heinous, murderous beating of teenager Emmett Till to his sexual prowess when interacting with female genitalia; in May, he lost a multi-million dollar endorsement deal with PepsiCo’s Mountain Dew as a result. In April, in the face of PepsiCo’s situation, Reebok also decided to proactively sever ties with hip-hop artist Rick Ross because of his own offensive lyrics related to date raping women.

Ultimately, media giants and corporations are in business to make money. Any activity that supports that objective will be played up, promoted and sold like hot cakes to keep making their pockets fatter. On the other hand, any activity that negatively effects or even looks to threaten their wallet will be severed immediately. Emmett Till’s family did not sit back, pass and allow Lil Wayne to have carte blanche to trample over and dishonor the death of their family member. By their speaking out and protesting the beverage company, events were placed into motion, which ultimately led to the loss of Lil Wayne’s endorsement deal. Others found the fortitude to speak up against Rick Ross, and Reebok smartly elected to forgo any negative publicity and resolved their potential issue before it could even become one.

Overall, these situations serve as testimony that when the Black community DEMANDS responsibility and accountability from one of their very own, people do listen and the results can be immediate, profoundly impacting, and have a huge domino effect.  This card of power has always been available to the Black community to play, but in its refusal to hold their own accountable and responsible for anything, the group has always passed on using it.

An old adage, slightly modified for relevance and greater impact, says that he who forgets the past—or even worse, is ignorant to his past—is doomed to REPEAT it.  Gangsta rap promoting street violence, crime, misogyny and use of the n-word are replicas of messages that were browbeaten into the hearts, minds and souls of African-American enslaved ancestors for more than 300 years.

A strong need was and still is felt to emasculate the manhood of the black male and a relentless campaign was undertaken to do just that. This dehumanization process and psychological onslaught of the human mind, implanting a whole new personality in heads, hearts, minds and souls, created an unwarranted image of a subjugated people categorized as n**gers.  Since n**gers were looked upon as sub-human and 3/5 of a person and not considered as human beings, they were, as a result, subjected to the worst form of inhumane treatment—mentally and physically—ever known to humankind.

Enslaved Africans were not willing participants of enslavement and their will to resist had to be broken, therefore, they were programmed and conditioned into assimilating a newly-created inferior status of themselves. Minds of black men were unbelievably mentally abused and broken.  They were forced to believe they possessed moral, intellectual, social and physical characteristics of a bestial savage beast, and a lazy, stupid, dirty, worthless parasite; forced to accept a lesser image of themselves as lethargic, intellectually childlike and ignorant, and obsessively self-indulgent angry animals prone to wanton violence. The enslaved were browbeaten to believe that their dark hue of skin was to be looked upon as physically unattractive, which explains the unhealthy color awareness consciousness in the Black community today.

Any sort of brutal act perpetrated upon the enslaved was always fueled with the rallying cry of the word n**ger as if this would make any unconscionable acts executed upon a so-called “non-human” n**ger acceptable in the eyesight of their Christian God.  While the hanged, beaten and maimed drew their final breath, the last words the victimized would always hear were the chants of n**ger, n**ger, n**ger ringing in their ears. Ironically, contemporary African Americans embrace the pejorative term FAILING to understand why they do, that this is not what they are and more importantly that there is NO such thing as a n**ger/n**ga.  During Hitler’s mistreatment of the Jewish community and experimentation in Eugenics, President Roosevelt admonished him for such conduct, to which Hitler replied, “Everything we do to Jewish people was learned from your treatment of the America Black people.”

Gangsta rap speaks of struggle, strife, and the negative experiences endured in a tone of self-loathe and hate. Because African Americans refuse to learn and fully accept their past as well as see the seriousness in continually giving life to remnants that should have all been left in the past, the feelings of inadequacy and frustration laced in every line of rap music are internalized and treated as legacies that are passed down from generation to generation. The unrelenting 400 year old daily assault on the Black psyche was and is designed to corrupt African Americans’ sense of racial unity and cohesion, mold the character of self-hatred, engender self-doubt and distrust among the group, thus, pulverizing Black unity and halting Black upward mobility.

In this 21^st century history is repeating itself through the self-destructive lyrics of rap music.  The impressionable young minds of our Black youth are treated as garbage disposals, dumping anything and everything into it that’s debasing—ALL for the almighty dollar—simultaneously promoting criminal behavior; and it’s happening with the blessing of the Black community since the group collectively refuses to put its foot down and say enough is enough.  Control of the precious minds of Black youth have been handed over to money-hungry rappers and indifferent comedians, actors and actresses, while the intelligentsia, ministers, community leaders sit back and do ABSOLUTELY nothing to stop it, this habitual practice of self-inflicted cultural genocide is totally foreign to other groups around the world.

This 400-year-old on-going indoctrination process needs to be stopped, just as Lil Wayne was stopped by the Till family. Black America must either stand up to these entertainers and the industry that have made billions stomping on the dignity of Black/African-Americans and no longer allow them to do it, or continue to be willing participants in the cultural genocide of black people. Just as slavery and the African-American Holocaust was no joke, cultural genocide is no laughing matter either.  African Americans must somehow learn to separate itself from the minstrel syndrome stop taking themselves and the n-word as a joke.

Today, the n-word is still alive and well because contemporary Black Americans have yet to demonstrate the ability and mental fortitude to let go of an 18^th century slave mentality.  Promoting, marketing, and commercializing the n-word globally contribute to keeping it alive and, in the process, are keeping its wicked and abhorrent history alive.

Black/African-Americans must, on the whole, adopt the attitude of the Till family, by standing up and speaking out against the mental abuse of our youth via gangsta rap music with its promotion and encouragement of criminal behavior, use of drugs, glorification of violence and the promotion of the n-word.  No one is an exception; EVERYONE is required to use their voice, stand united, and hold to the fire anyone that attempts to continue to tear down the Black community.  Sacrificing the minds of our youth, glorifying and applauding the status of those who are now financial tycoons as a result of their predatory ways speaks volumes about the over-all unhealthy mentality of the Black/African-American community, our youth deserves more, infinitely more.

 H. Lewis Smith is the founder and president of UVCC, the United Voices for a Common Cause, Inc. (www.theunitedvoices.com),  and author of “Bury that Sucka: A Scandalous Love Affair with the N-Word”. Follow him on Twitter: www.twitter.com/thescoop1

TV One’s “Unsung” Starts New Season January 23rd

TV One’s signature music biography series sheds much-deserved light on some of the most influential, talented and, somehow, forgotten R&B, soul, hip hop, funk and gospel artists of the last 30 years.

Before Barry White and Teddy Pendergrass, there was Isaac Hayes, whose music set the scene for romantic seduction on stage and off. But Isaac was more than a legendary ladies man. He was a creative genius, who rose from dire poverty to become one of the driving forces in popular music, co-writing classic hits like ‘Hold On I’m Comin’ and ‘Soul Man’, while reinventing popular ballads like ‘Walk On By’ with stunning emotional force.

By the early 70s he’d become known as ‘Black Moses’ a proud and positive-minded role model whose acts of public and private generosity were legend. But behind the gold chains and dark glasses was a sensitive and insecure figure whose compulsion to provide for others took its toll in unstable relationships, lost fortunes, and a tragically foreshortened career.

Now, those closest to Isaac, including family members, life-long friends and musical associates, tell the “Unsung“ story of an American icon.

Check out Isaac Hayes, Eddie Kendricks, Lou Rawls, EPMD, Mint Condition, Johnny Gill and more on the new season of “Unsung” beginning January 23, 2013 at 10:00 pm ET.  Click here to watch full episodes of past broadcasts.

If you love “Unsung,” another best-kept secret on TV One is “Celebrity Crime Files.”  This series delves into some of the most controversial crimes of our generation by exploring the rise and fall of the entertainment, sports and literary world’s most prominent and promising figures including Marvin Gaye, Jam Master Jay and Peter Tosh.

Celebrity Interviews with Valder Beebe

 

THE VALDER  BEEBE  SHOW

Got 5 Minutes?  She’s Got The Interview.

Interviews with actors, directors, entertainers, and celebrities conducted at press junkets, movie premieres, and one-on-one interview session’s in-studio, via satellite, Skype and phone. Interviews conducted with the world’s most fascinating people in exotic locations: Istanbul, Israel, Canada, London, South Africa……with more to come

Check out a few of Valder’s interviews featuring Donald Faison, Mary, Mary, and Tyler Perry and Tasha Smith:

The Valder Beebe Show

FM / INTERNET / INTERNET RADIO

SATELLITE VIDEO / NEWSPAPERS / PODCAST / MAGAZINES

You can keep up with Valder Beebe on our main web site located at www.blackmeninamerica.com/valder.htm.

Earl Anthony Cooper: A Proud and Accomplished Young Man Dreaming Big

Exclusive Interview by Black Men In America.com

Earl Anthony Cooper is an impressive young man.  Raised in Wilmington, Delaware, Cooper came to my attention through my friend Mike Stewart, Sr.  Cooper is a graduate of Morehouse College, (Class of 2011), where he earned a Bachelors of Arts Degree in Political Science with a concentration in Philosophy.  In addition, Cooper was Vice–President of The Next American Great Poet, where he was involved in mentoring local Atlanta high school students on the importance of literature and poetry–all at the tender age of 22.

Cooper was the first black All-State golfer for the state of Delaware.  He was awarded a golf scholarship to play for Morehouse College’s golf team where he led the college to their first Division II National Championship in 2010.

Cooper wrote a children’s book called “Hello, Maroon Tiger! “ The book is available at all major online retailers.

We caught up with Earl Cooper over the holidays where he joined us for lunch at a local Washington, DC area restaurant.  You can watch our exclusive interview with Earl below.

You can contact Earl directly at eac5469@gmail.com.  You can also visit his official web site at www.earldreambig.com.

The Genius of Leon Huff

Leon Huff was born on April 8, 1942 in the New Jersey city of Camden. Huff began playing the piano at age five, which later led to his becoming an accompanist for the junior choir of the 10th Street Baptist Church in Camden. Later, he could frequently be found performing on street corners with “doo wop” groups. He enjoyed minor early success with a group known as The Dynaflows, who after becoming The Lavenders, enjoyed a regional hit with their recording of “The Slide.”

In the late ’50s, Huff became a commuter between Philadelphia and New York City. He became a well-known figure on the recording studio scene in Manhattan and got to know a host of major league songwriter/producers such as Jeff Barry and Ellie Greenwich, Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller and Phil Spector.

Taking his cue from these acknowledged stars of their craft (Barry, Greenwich, Leiber and Stoller are all Songwriters’ Hall of Fame inductees), Huff began concentrating on his songwriting skills. His first recording as a writer was the number one hit, “The Boy from New York City,” by the Ad Libs.

Later, he wrote the hit song, “Mixed Up, Shook Up Girl,” recorded by Patty and the Emblems. At about the same time, already recognized in New York for his playing, he became active again in Philadelphia as well, as session man, songwriter and neophyte producer.

Already tasting significant success, Huff also found himself in the same building as Kenny Gamble. In 1965, a series of chance meetings in the elevator resulted in a decision to try working together and the two soon formed a production company which later resulted in such hits as “Expressway to Your Heart,” and “Cowboys to Girls,” and later brought the pair into the orbits of such prominent hitmakers as Wilson Pickett, Dusty Springfield, Jerry Butler, Nancy Wilson, Joe Simon and Archie Bell and the Drells.

In 1971, the team of Gamble and Huff formed Philadelphia International Records, a company that would have tremendous impact on the course of pop music-around the world in the years to come. Signed to a distribution deal by CBS Records, the company turned out hit after hit after hit, writing and producing such entries as “Back Stabbers” by the O’Jays; “Me and Mrs. Jones” by Billy Paul; “If You Don’t Know Me by Now” and “The Love I Lost,” both by Harold Melvin and The Blue Notes; and “Love Train” and “For the Love of Money,” by The O’Jays.

Huff is the proud owner of more than 300 gold and platinum records, has been nominated for a number of Grammy Awards and has received numerous Philadelphia and Camden area civic awards.

His latest project on the brink of being released is an album entitled Groovy People. With over 15 years in the making Leon Huff is finally ready to share it with the world. The album consist of remakes of some old time favorites songs such as Hey There Lonely Girl originally sung by Eddie Holman. And also The Way You Do The Things You originally sung by The Temptations. Also featured on the album Mr. Huff’s latest group R&B sensation Ju-Taun as well as new ballads that you are guaranteed to enjoy.

If you would like more information on Leon Huff visit  www.dxxnyc.com or contact Double XXposure at 212-629-9404 or email at inquiries@dxxnyc.com. 

Raising Him Alone: An Interview with David Miller

By Vanessa Werts

Across America, in the inner-city and in suburbia, single mothers struggle with raising boys alone. This issue has clearly emerged as one of the most consequential trends facing society today. And David Miller, co-author of the book, Raising Him Alone, is on a personal mission, standing watch, doing his part to support single mothers – Black single mothers in particular – and the positive development of Black males.

During my interview with Miller at the 2010 National Congressional Black Caucus Book Pavilion, his passion was contagious. Miller’s vision is for the well being of everyone involved in the struggle from the son to the mother or caregiver to the absent-father alike. Therefore, it is only natural that he would be co-founder of the Raising Him Alone Campaign, a national movement that executes the foundational principles he and co-author Matthew P. Stevens address in their book [Raising Him Alone].

Single mother parenting was long thought to be primarily an African-American problem, stemming from poverty and poor education. However over the last decade, it has become an epidemic crossing both racial and class lines. “We started the campaign to really focus on Black and Latina moms,” says Miller. “But we get a tremendous amount of calls from White mothers. The issue is beyond an epidemic.”

Miller shared with me insights about the book, the campaign, and the community activities and resources dedicated to inspire and inform the millions of single mothers who struggle daily with the challenges of raising boys.

The David Miller Interview

BMIA: What is the Raising Him Alone campaign about?

D. Miller: The campaign is a movement to provide greater access to resources for single mothers and grandmothers throughout this country.

BMIA: Where does your passion for this movement or your connection to this issue come from?

D. Miller: When I was a freshman in college, my best friend was shot and killed standing next to me and I was 19-years-old. I was at Morgan, he was at Morehouse; some guys tried to rob us…they shot my friend in the back and he died in my arms. And since then I’ve dedicated my life to really improving the lives of children and families in this country. And so, I’m real clear that we’ve got to do this work in our communities, or else we’re not going to make it.

BMIA: When does the campaign kick-off?

D. Miller: The campaign kicked-off in January 2009. We did a major launch in two cities: Baltimore and Newark, New Jersey. I invited some dynamic mothers who’ve raised sons to come and help me kick it off. Common’s [rapper, actor] mother, Dr. Mahalia Hines; Mos Def’s [rapper, actor] mother, Sheron Smith; and Talib Kweli’s [rapper, activist] mother, Dr. Brenda Greene. I brought them on-board to help me launch the two cities, and now we’ve expanded to Chicago and Philadelphia. These are our four main cities. But we’re working in communities across this country really doing some very interesting viable Web-based things like using Facebook to create discussion groups with moms. We’re creating a tremendous movement around serious parenting.

BMIA: What has been the response to campaign?

D. Miller: The response has been absolutely overwhelming. We average about forty phone calls and E-mails a week from mothers who are in some of the roughest parts of say, maybe Memphis, DC, or Newark, New Jersey, to moms that have MBA degrees, PhD degrees from excellent colleges and universities, who got divorced and for whatever reason, dad hasn’t stepped up. And so it’s been an amazing cross-section of parents from different socioeconomic backgrounds.

BMIA: Have you in any way included fathers in the campaign?

D. Miller: Yes. Historically, my background is I’ve written two other books about responsible fatherhood. And so, year one was really to launch the campaign and raise money. Year two has really been focused on launching the largest responsible fatherhood Web site you’ll find in this country which we’re gonna try to connect it with President Obama’s Responsible Fatherhood Initiative. I was in Washington three weeks ago speaking to all of the federal grantees that received responsible fatherhood money. The Web site is going to be for any dad: married dads, divorced dads, military; dads that are incarcerated, to really talk about what does it mean to be an exceptional father. And so dads are an integral part of the campaign.

BMIA: What type of information can single mothers expect from the book, Raising Him Alone?

D. Miller: In the book, we kind of roll out a blueprint of how to raise a son, as well as things like mentoring. Susan Taylor has a national initiative; Michael Baisden has a national initiative on mentoring. The reality is in all those initiatives, we’ve not gotten enough black and brown men to sign up and honor their commitment. So one of the things we talk about is, while we’re trying to find a mentor for the boy, there’s things mom has to do in the home. For example, number one is the boy can never be the man of the house. That’s a mistake that I think mothers make, particularly as boys get to adolescence. Moms say you’re the man of the house because your father is not here.  And what happens with a lot of boys is they think because dad’s not here I need to step up and bring money in. So a lot of boys will start steeling cars, selling drugs… You start to see a lot of pathologies exist because mom has told this 13-year-old that he’s man of the house. So a lot of what we’re trying to do is really work with community-based organizations and work with schools. We’ve created an awesome learning community so mothers can go to our Web site, sign up and they can receive free text messages, free voicemail message about being a good parent…about financial literacy tips. We send out an e-mail blast that goes out to about 11,000 mothers and grandmothers across the country. We’ve created a Facebook group, Single Mothers Raising Boys, with over 1,000 mothers connected to that. The goal is also connecting mothers to resources, things like mental health; things like credit repair; a lot of stuff on co-parenting. I mean when you look at the divorce rates in our community, we’re in trouble. We’re in serious trouble.

BMIA: Have you had any testimonials on the impact of the work you’re doing?

D. Miller: We’ve had some amazing testimonials. I’ll start with Ms. Mildred, a 74-year-old great-grandmother living in the projects in the West Ward in Newark, raising five boys by herself… hypertension and diabetes. When we went to go interview Ms Mildred, we were able to stop her from getting evicted from her apartment. We were able to connect her to free mental health services for both herself and for those boys. Even though the boys are all under 12-years-old, you started to really see some behavioral challenges with those boys. We can document many of the families that we’ve reached as well as the dads that we’ve reached. And that’s one of the reasons why we decided to create the fatherhood Web site. We met a brother in Michigan whose children lived in Atlanta, Georgia and we were able to re-connect him with his children. Because he was a long distance dad, we were able to work with him and work with the mom to develop some strategies. One of the first things we did was recommend that the dad buy a cell phone and mail it to the boy so the boy could call his dad. But we had to go through the mom to help her work through her own issues because they didn’t get married to say, this is something that can happen. And so, even being able to work through something as simple as communication with the father and son is another example.

The Raising Him Alone Campaign seeks to create a larger community dialogue around the importance of supporting single mothers raising boys. Through partnerships with a host of organizations, they are mobilizing single mothers and absent-fathers to save our future, particularly our boys.

The siren is blaring. The call to engage the issues in raising healthy, positive boys demands our attention. What price will society ultimately play if this trend continues? The clock is ticking.

To learn more about Raising Him Alone, the book, and the work co-founders, David Miller and Matthew P. Stevens are doing with the Raising Him Alone Campaign, visit www.RaisingHimAlone.com.

BMIA.com Reporter Vanessa Werts and David Miller

David C. Miller, M.Ed. is the co-founder and Chief Visionary Officer of the Urban Leadership Institute, LLC, (www.urbanyouth.org) a social enterprise that focuses on developing positive youth development strategies. ULI provides strategic planning, professional development, positive youth development concepts and crisis management services.

Thank you Lee McDonald from The Renaissance Group (TRG) for making this interview possible.

Mildred Muhammad Speaks – Exclusive Video Interview with Former Wife of the D.C. Sniper

By Gary Johnson, Founder/Publisher – Black Men In America.com

Mildred D. Muhammad is the ex-wife of John Allen Muhammad – the convicted and recently executed DC sniper who terrorized the Washington DC metropolitan area in late 2002.  After several years of silence, Mildred decided to speak openly about her day-to-day experiences as a survivor of domestic violence and how it affected her three children.

I had seen Mildred’s interviews on CNN and FOX News. Some of the questions appeared to be anything but “fair and balanced” and the interviews were short.  There wasn’t enough time for Mildred to adequately address the questions.

I decided to reach out to Mildred to give her an opportunity to tell her story uninterrupted.

Mildred agreed to an unscripted and unrehearsed interview.  I assigned this task to Janice Wilson and off we went to tape the interview at Mildred’s office a few weeks ago (December 2009).  We divided the interview into six parts.  Part One of the interview is listed below.

As you watch and listen to Mildred’s story you will learn that Mildred did not seek the limelight.  She was thrust into the spotlight because her former husband was John Allen Muhammad. Mildred new book, “Scared Silent,” details her her day-to-day experiences as a survivor of domestic violence and how it affected her three children.  A lot has been said about Mildred and why she wrote this book.  Mildred has dedicated her life to helping survivors of domestic violence and abuse.  I believe in telling her story, she is doing the work of others.  Don’t take my word for it, watch and listen for yourself.

Mildred Muhammad and Janice Wilson

Mildred has agreed to write a monthly column on surviving domestic violence and abuse.  You can read her column and buy her book on the main web site at www.blackmeninamerica.com/abuse.htm.

 

Any thoughts about Mildred and her story?  Click on the links below to watch Janice Wilson’s exclusive six part interview with Mildred Muhammad.

I am Mildred Muhammad.  I am the Executive Director of After The Trauma.  A non-profit organization established, based upon my own experience, to assist survivors of domestic violence.

I am a consultant with the Office for Victims of Crime and a board member of different domestic violence organizations. I have become a national spokesperson for domestic violence and I have been and continue to be honored as being the keynote speaker, telling my story for several conferences, workshops and seminars regarding domestic violence.

I share my expertise on what it’s like being a victim and a survivor of domestic violence without physical scars to victims and survivors of domestic violence, advocates, law enforcements, therapists, counselors, mental health providers, medical health providers, various universities and many others.  I have participated in training law enforcements regarding victims of domestic violence without physical scars.  I have received many awards, recognitions and certificates regarding my work in assisting victims and survivors of domestic violence.  I have written a book titled, “Scared Silent“ which details my emotionally abusive relationship.

You see, my ex husband was the convicted and now executed sniper of the DC metropolitan area, John Allen Muhammad.  Although most believe, based on what the media reported, that the random shootings were about two African American men going around shooting innocent people for financial gain and control of this area.  That is not the truth.

Unfortunately, the random shootings were a cover to hide my murder.  John was to come in as the grieving father to get custody of our children.  It was a domestic violence/custody issue.  Others outside of the DC area know this to be factual because this case originated in Washington State.  Others say that my children and I were not victims.  However, we were the first victims and because we weren’t physically injured or killed, we are looked upon as causing the problem and bringing trouble to this side of the country.

Since there are many definitions for domestic violence, it is difficult to know if you are in an abusive relationship.  So, let’s start there.

What Is Domestic Violence?

Domestic violence is a pattern of abusive, controlling behaviors that some individuals use to control their intimate partners. Domestic violence is any type of violence, abuse or threat of violence that one partner in a relationship commits against another. It includes physical, sexual, emotional, psychological, stalking, economic and verbal abuse.

Examples are punches, kicks, slaps, hits shoves, forcing partner to perform degrading tasks, using degrading remarks, sexual assault, rape, secretly following you around and other tactics used to establish power and control over a partner. Domestic Violence can occur in any relationship, married or unmarried, homosexual and heterosexual.  Now domestic violence is considered an offense if the person who is being abused is dating the ex of a prior relationship.

You see, you either are a victim, a survivor or know someone who is or was either.    This is how badly it has become in our society and yet it is only publicize when the victim is physically mutilated, physically abused or death has occurred.  No one considers the victim is in danger if NO physical scars are present.   Domestic violence does not discriminate.  It doesn’t matter what religion, race, gender, financial or educational status, man, woman, child or elderly.  Domestic violence affects us all either directly or indirectly.

Statistics say that “every 9 to 15 seconds a woman is abused”.  It is unfortunate when we hear or see this, we automatically think a physical assault has occurred.  I am striving to shift the thinking of society.  When you begin to hear statistics from others, instead of thinking of the number ‘9’ or ’15’ and someone being hit…think of ‘number 1’ and what has occurred.

It began as a verbal assault.  Someone said a hurtful remark and now emotions are out of control!  Soon, yelling begins, name calling, the effort to destroy the others’ character and then…a physical assault.  Most times, a physical assault is not the result.  However, with such anger, hurtful comments are made that one cannot take back.  Once anger subsides, “I’m sorry” is hard to accept because out of anger, the truth was told.  We have to learn to talk to each other more effectively when a disappointment or a frustration occurs.  Proper communication is one way to alter the path of a domestic dispute.

I want to personally thank Gary Johnson for this opportunity to expand my work in assisting victims and survivors of domestic violence.  This monthly article will be published through Black Men In America.com and their effort to heighten awareness regarding domestic abuse/violence.  This article will focus on abuse regarding the victim, survivor, abuser, children and the elderly.

I hope you will continue to visit the site and read the articles. It is my hope and prayer that the information provided will assist those who need it and act as a resource to those who know someone in an abusive relationship.

If you find that you need assistance, you may e-mail me directly at Mildred@afterthetrauma.org.  I will respond as soon as I receive your message.  I will assist you as best I can. Please remember…YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

You can also follow me on Facebook and Twitter.

Take good care of yourself,

Mildred